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Mr. Mascot Solo Battle of Sports Mascot Rankings

Mr. Mascot
July 12, 2018 - 4:52 pm

Mr. Mascot is an unknown individual who works at WFNZ

Weekend content? Wow, you’re welcome. List season is almost (thankfully) over with unless you’re into headlines like “Pro Football Talk’s Top 50 Fullbacks from the 1970s.” HARD PASS. Unless you’re a big Jim Burleson fan, apologies. But, I thought I would take advantage of it and write up by Top 10 Mascots! You’ll have to wait to rage on my Bottom 10. I did a poll earlier in the week (because I care about my audience damn it!) +60% of the votes said NCAA Mascots were their favorite. So, if I exclude Fin the Whale from Vancouver… no hard feelings brother. 

10. HokieBird, Some-sort-a Turkey, Virginia Tech- This pudgy guy has been the face of Virginia Tech Athletics since 1987. A nice change up from all the Eagles in the NCAA. There are easily… 50 to 700 schools that have an eagle as a mascot. Rumor has it that Frank Beamer has a huge Hokiebird across his back.

© Geoff Burke-USA TODAY Sports

9. Sir Purr, Panther, Carolina Panthers- I feel like if Sir Purr didn’t make the list, Charlotte would riot. 

© Jeremy Brevard-USA TODAY Sports

8. K.C. Wolf, Wolf, Kansas City Chiefs- First off, this dude gets an ATV. Second, he has NOTHING to do with Kansas City or Chiefs. (Probably better that he isn’t) But, he was the first NFL mascot elected to the Mascot Hall of Fame. That’s really a thing by the way: https://mascothalloffame.com/

© Denny Medley-USA TODAY Sports

7. Raptor, he’s a f%#ing  Raptor, Toronto Raptors- Negative -7,000 creativity points for his name. But, Toronto pulls all those points back and then some for picking a raptor! And the raptor has been called out by a Professional Canadian Tennis player (I’m quaking in my boots) on national tv too. 

© Dan Hamilton-USA TODAY Sports

6. Jackson DeVille, Jaguar, Jacksonville Jaguars- Before Jacksonville was good, this chunky Jag was the only thing the franchise had going for them. He’s been known to dangle from a rope, by one foot, above the stadium… that’s more terrifying than being punched by Pac Man Jones in an airport. 

© Reinhold Matay-USA TODAY Sports

5. Raymond, Sea Dog, Tampa Bay Rays- If he was a giant stingray he would look ridiculous. Sting Rays are not intimidating. It’s not like one has ever killed anyb…. RIP Steve Irwin. Can we give Raymond a round of applause for having all that fuzz in the hot Tampa summer sun?!

© Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports

4. Hugo, Hornet, Charlotte Hornets- Well, you may see this as bias because I have two Charlotte mascots on here. And… you’re right. Sir Purr made it so my tires don’t get slashed. But, Hugo is a mascot favorite nation-wide. And why shouldn’t he? He’s a purple hornet! The only thing that would make Hugo better is if he could help the Hornets field goal percentage (7th to last). 

© Jeremy Brevard-USA TODAY Sports

3. The Oregon Duck, Duck, University of Oregon- Hey, that’s the duck’s name. I didn’t name him! Maybe complain to someone that can do some real good: Jimmy Straton, Senior Associate Athletic Director of Communications at the University of Oregon, [email protected], 1-541-346-5538.

© Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports
 

2. Big Red, Hilltopper, Western Kentucky University- I know it’s a “Hill Topper” but, that’s straight nonsense. This thing is always leading the mascot charge during college bowl season. And, Big Red is back in court. Yes, you read that right, in court. There is an Italian company that is suing WKU over copyright of the character (http://www.espn.com/mens-college-basketball/story/_/id/23716833). All I know is that the Hilltopper was created in 1979 and the Italian character is from 2000… enough said.

© Steve Roberts-USA TODAY Sports

 
1. Phanatic, ???????, Philadelphia Phillies- Being ‘on the nose’ or ‘on par’ with lists is boring, but the Phanatic is the king or queen… or the boss of mascots. It’s been on Always Sunny in Philadelphia, 30 Rock and other various cameos. In a city full of miserable %$#s, the Phanatic is a light at the end of a trash-filled tunnel.  

© Eric Hartline-USA TODAY Sports

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